“Why don’t people recognize Link in TOTK” bc everyone imagines the legendary swordsman to be built like Ganondorf and Link doesn’t bother correcting anyone bc being hailed as a hero is like on the bottom of his priorities, which are topped by things like “Bake one of every pie”
Rando farmer: They say that once the noble hero of legend passed by this very village! Isn’t that wonderful to imagine, genderfluid stranger?
Link, 5'6" with 2" heels and wearing a backless dress suspiciously stained with blood: no yeah that’s wild
“Wouldn’t they recognize him bc he’s with Zelda” Everyone interacting with Zelda was like “Wow, the princess!! The princess who saved Hyrule is here, talking to us! Plus some guy with three sets of pronouns who’s building a bomb but more importantly The Princess!! Wow!!”
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Zelda keeps coming across spare genders she doesn’t need and Link follows behind scooping them all up off the ground like a starving trash possum
Someone uses an unfamiliar pronoun around Zelda, and she hears the item pickup sound come from Link
so this might be tmi but the first time i jacked off it was like 2005? I was playing the sims 2 for the first time and i didn’t know anything about Gay but i made my male sim kiss don lothario, which i didn’t think would work. i then googled “2 sims kissing (boys)” and that led me down a rabbit hole (lol sims 3 reference there), and yeah, ya know, I did the self-woohoo. that same night there was an oprah re-run about teenage pregnancy and i was horrified. oh my god, i was convinced i was pregnant, nevermind that i am a little cis gay boy with no uterus. nevermind that i was a virgin. i was CERTAIN I was pregnant. Like, 900%. I had done the nasty and had become filled with my own vile seed. I started getting really self-conscious about my belly expanding. I didn’t want to google anything about masturbation leading to pregnancy out of fear it would confirm all my worst fears. My male sim got abducted by aliens and came back with morning sickness. He gave birth to twin aliens. that confirmed it in my mind that it was biological possible for men to carry children, perhaps even their own.. what was i going to tell my parents when i gave birth to myself? anyway I went to the doctor with a cold and he asked me what was wrong and i told him i was pregnant and he pissed himself laughing. this whole ordeal lasted about 5 months, but the lasting effect will probably follow me to the grave.
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